Ok readers, I have some big news to share with you. If I know you in real life and you’re finding out via this blog post…well…sorry? Oops?
My news is: I’m getting divorced. <<insert gasps and shocked reactions here>> Ultimately, it’s a good thing and I think my ex and I will both be happier. But, that whole story is not the point of this post. The point of this post is that I casually joined Tinder and OMG some of the profiles are hysterical. Here are my 10 favorite (so far!)
- “Donald Trump is your new president. How much worse could I be?” Matt, 30
- “Sexiest thing about me? I use “your” and “you’re” correctly 10 outta 10 times.” Leonine, 28
- “First man on Earth to be clinically diagnosed with resting bitch face(RBF).” Grant, 36
- “Live on my own and shower regularly.” Herb, 38
- “If you like bad boys, you’re in luck, I’m bad at everything.” Robert, 35
- “Well I’m 30 years old and I don’t live in my mother’s basement so I think I’m doing pretty good for myself. I can open a jar of pickles in 2 seconds flat.” Ben, 30
- “Unemployed and mentally unstable. Other than that, my mom says I’m a real catch.” Nick, 35
- “Dear people who say that they “like fun”, Everybody likes fun. Nobody is having fun and thinking, “oh no, not this shit again”.” Nick, 36
- “I am just a Jim Halpert with a slightly better job, looking for my Dwight Schrute with a slightly better face.” Deep, 34
- “I’m just here to meet people while I poop.” Vinny, 28
Ironically, I also got send an article by TheLeague.com. The article is “You’ve Been Flirting On Dating Apps All Wrong!” Obviously, I opened that email right away. LOL. What have I been doing wrong?? Well…nothing, actually. I’ve been doing things right. Phew! :P But there are some very interesting stats that I thought I’d share with you!
Those who use emojis are more than three times as likely to exchange numbers (convert) and tend to have more than double the conversation lengths compared to those who don’t! (“Conversion” means that a phone number was exchanged.)
Average Conversation Length: 15 messages
Don’t use emojis:
Average Conversation Length: 6 messages
Flirty* women are 6 times more likely to exchange numbers, and have 2 times longer conversations than non-flirty women.
Average Conversation Length: 10 messages
Average Conversation Length: 4.5 messages
*Flirty here is defined as those women who have used the following words/ symbols in any of their match conversations:
“heyy”, “:)”, “haha”, “mmm”, “lol”, “cute”, “gorgeous”, “funny”, “handsome”, “aww”