Hi. So this is awkward. It’s been a while since I posted a Weigh-In Wednesday update. As a general rule, when someone ghosts about their weight loss, it’s not a good sign. I am no exception! I fell off the wagon! :O Yes, yes. I know it’s so soon! There are lots of factors. Some of them are excuses and some of them are reasons.
I’m not sure how much to really say in this post. I don’t know how much of my ‘inner workings’ I want to be public, on the internet. Plus, my mom reads these posts. LOL. (And this is the ONLY post topic she reads on mine. Hi, mom! Love you!)
Since my last post, I have gained a 1/2 pound. Not super bad, but definitely not good, either!
I have some added stress in my life that is making this whole “self-improvement” thing hard. It’s nothing out of the usual – work stuff, life stuff, girly stuff. I think right now, the major contributing factor of my struggle is my depression. I don’t think I’ve ever talked about it on my blog before…so…surprise! I’m medicated daily! LOL.
What this means is there are some days where just doing the basic routine is difficult. To try and explain what it feels like…it literally feels like my veins have solid lead in them. It’s this bizarre feeling of being weighed down…but there is nothing there. Nothing happened. Nothing is wrong. My body just literally is feeling the weight of its own world. Have you ever been under a weighted blanket? Or walked around with ankle weights on? It’s kinda like that. You can move but it’s so much harder.
Not surprisingly, trying to tell yourself to ‘snap out of it’ does not work. I read a super analogy the other day. When someone needs prescription glasses, nobody tells them to just ‘try harder’ or ‘snap out of it’ or ask them ‘what’s wrong? Did something happen?’ No. They just need glasses to experience the world like the average person. That’s a great analogy for mental health problems. I need Prozac to help me experience the world in a more normal way. It just doesn’t seem to work every day. :\
So there you have it. The real secret to my struggles. Fair warning: If anyone says that exercise cures depression, I will go fucking postal. Even when I was walking 5 miles per day, I still needed Prozac. (That would be the 2012 picture in the collage.) I’m aware of the benefits of exercise. K. Thanks!